She sensed something was wrong the moment she received his text, asking to meet. But she got ready anyway, wearing the t-shirt that he bought her for their anniversary hoping to aid his return of memory. Lately she felt that he is getting further withdrawn away from her. He no longer answered her calls, and when she asked him through text message, he would say he didn’t notice as he was in bathroom, or was out with friends, or anything else that seemed absurd to her.
However, she didn’t show how disappointed she was feeling, or how painful she was feeling, having to see him slip away from her. She still treated him with kindness, and patience. She knew she should not force him to remember if he could not. That was the right thing to do.
“Hey there,” she said. He was already waiting for her that their designated meeting spot. He inclined his head in acknowledgement. Her heart ached to see his unsmiling face, knowing that she was about to be presented with a bad news of some sort.
“Sorry I was late, um, you see I was looking for this t-shirt that you bought me last year...” she gave a little twirl, “I thought, you know, it might help you remember,” she finished, taking a seat beside him.
The moment she sat down, a long silence stretch between them. He was thinking about how he was going to break it to her in the gentlest manner possible.
“I have something to tell you...”
“Ben, would you like to get a drink...” they said at the same time.
She laughed. “Um, you first,” she said, smiling.
He took a deep breath. “Elisa, I, um, met someone,” he started, and her smile went dead. “I think I’m falling in love with her,” he continued, as her world crumbled and thunder clashed in her head. She felt her heart slowly, inch by inch being sliced apart.
“Ok,” she mustered her courage and blurted it out. “So you want to end us,”
He was silent, keeping his sight on the ground, he nodded slowly.
Her lips were quivering, and she could feel her hands trembled as she played with their engagement ring on her finger.
“Uh, will you give me one last chance to try and make you remember? Please?” she knew she was grovelling, and she did not care. If she wanted to try and win his heart, she’s got to forget about her dignity for this time.
He was silent again for the longest time. Why, Elisa? What is the point? My heart is already with that girl. It is too late for us. He thought.
Elisa could feel the tears slowly gathering in the pool of her eyes. She had to use every ounce of energy she possessed at the time to hold it in check. She can’t cry in front of him. She must stay strong. Her heart felt like being poked by a million thorns but she kept her face straight.
Ben sighed deeply. “Ok, we’ll try one last time,” he agreed albeit reluctantly. He saw the ring on her finger and had to look away. Looking at her in pain, knowing he was the cause of it and he was helpless to do anything about it is tearing him apart.
The closest thing that he can describe his feelings as, were that of pity. Other than that, he felt nothing at all towards her. He didn’t know what to do. He tried, but he could not remember anything. He could not summon up his feelings to love her, like everyone claimed he should. From their pictures, he could see that they were very much in love, and they were happy. But he can’t feel all that now. He just can’t.
To be continued...
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