Exclusive Breastfeeding Journey Part 3 – Weaning Off

In June 2017, our little firstborn turned 2 years old. Alhamdulillah, we managed to still provide him with his mother’s milk until then. However, with every journey, there must be an end for it. Having gone through very painful episodes of blocked duct for more than a couple of times throughout the 2 years duration, I was naturally anxious about stopping.

Nevertheless, for various reasons, I wanted to stop my son from breastfeeding. And I prefer a method that does not involve cheating or tricking my son. That’s my preference, and I respect other moms’ methods should they feel the need to do it any other way.

A few months before stopping, I consulted with many people, mostly my own seniors or friends that have gone through the process. They shared a few tips and from there, I formed a strategy. I also read up on the topic to prepare myself mentally and physically. Coincidentally, my husband was away for the fasting month and the majority of the ‘Raya’ month. From my previous experience of fasting while breastfeeding my son, I really do not think I could go on another month of it. (Bad thinking, I know!) I felt really weak and tired last year, so I decided to ask my son to refrain from breastfeeding during the day throughout the month of Ramadan this year. Instead, I gave him the liquid, full cream milk when he wanted milk. I started to give him ‘the talk’ about a couple of weeks beforehand, to make sure that he understands and cooperates with me.

The first few days, he asked for it. We called it ‘susu ummi’ and the full cream milk as ‘susu kotak’. The first dew days of putting him to his daytime nap was quite a challenge because he is used to breastfeeding till he falls asleep. Thankfully after a couple of weeks, he got used to the arrangements. This went on until the first couple of weeks of ‘raya’, when my husband returned home.

A couple of days after my husband returned, our son seemed to be in such a good mood that we started to completely stop him from breastfeeding. We told him that he’s a big boy now, already two years old, and he could stop ‘susu ummi’ and continue eating normal food. If he misses his milk, he can drink ‘susu kotak’. We struggled for the first week, whereby he would wake up in the middle of the night, throwing tantrums and all, because he was hungry. So we tried feeding him a night snack right before putting him to sleep, to prevent hunger pang in the middle of the night. So far, it’s been nearly a month and he seemed to have been weaned off completely and successfully.

I feared that I might suffer from blocked duct or anything once I stop. Fortunately, I survived without any need to express my milk and the supply dwindled to the point that even my breasts returned to their size before I got pregnant.

I’m blessed that my husband is around to help and that my son is cooperative. Alhamdulillah, we managed to complete that part of our duty to our son. May our next chid will be blessed in the same way. Aameen.

All the best to other moms out there! I hope this sharing helps.

Exclusive Breastfeeding Journey Part 2

I can’t remember how many time I have cried in pain and frustration at seeing my son getting more yellow by the minute, with his dark green stool (normal adequately breastfed babies should have mustard-coloured stool) and refusal to drink. I felt like a failure, as though as a mother, I was unable to help my son through one of his most crucial stage of his life. Needless to say, comments from others did not help, too.

“...the baby is crying every night as though he doesn’t get enough milk...”

“...why don’t you give him formula milk...”

“...the baby sleeps too much, why don’t you wake him up...”

and so on. Thank goodness my husband had been there a lot. The one week of leave that he was with me was so precious, because otherwise, I felt so alone and down. He’ll prepare my daily bath water and snacks with hot drinks whenever I need it. I can remember panicking when he had to leave to settle our son’s birth certificate and other paperwork, and the rush of absolute relief when he returned. And the help I get from my in-laws with the baby and my meals was priceless.

As crazy as it was during that time, the thing that kept me going was knowing that the moment will pass. I am a mother now, I told myself. I must be strong for my son! No matter how painful breastfeeding and the stitched wounds down there before they heal were, or how tired I was, or how unstable my emotions were, I must keep going for my son! This tiny, breathing human being needs me. I must be strong!

Although I managed to pump out a lot of milk at that time, I did not freeze any due to storage reason. We did not have extra fridge space. So I would recommend to parents-to-be who intend to continue breastfeeding their children even after going back to work to save up for a freezer to store the milk supply. I didn’t, mainly because my husband and I have decided that for the time being I would not have to go back to work. So I only kept some milk as much as our refrigerator can accommodate.

Day after day, our struggle during feeding time became less and less. At one month post delivery, I had my routine post natal check up and was given a clean bill of health by the doctor. The trick was, I kept taking the pregnancy vitamins (iron, folic acid, vitamin b-complex) as well as the milk that I drink during pregnancy (Frisomum) to replace the loss during delivery and breastfeeding (blood loss, nutrients, etc.) A few weeks down the road and my son no longer needs to be checked for his jaundice. His weight is gaining accordingly. He is healthy.

During the first few months, I had some issues with cracked nipple due to poor sucking technique by my son. After all, both of us were still learning. The only required remedy for me was to apply my own milk around the sore area and leave it to air-dry. A couple of hours later it will feel much better. It was the method I learnt in nursing school, so I’m sharing it with all of you.

After that, I realised that both of us were becoming better at feeding. Initially, my son, who is quite easily excited would be looking for the nipple frantically - a lot like a hungry bird pecking to get food. If he didn’t find it in a couple of seconds, he would cry and cry angrily. Naturally, the baby is unable to see yet, so he was easily anxious. I had to move as quick as I can to offer him the nipple. After a few months, though, he can find it himself, and to my profound surprise, the initial pain during let-down reflex was then replaced by a kind of relaxing and pleasant sensation that I do not know how to describe. It feels so good that I frequently fall asleep while my son is feeding! :)

Honestly, I did not take any so-called milk booster product, as I am quite a skeptic when it comes to those products. I only made sure I drink enough plain water and also take milk myself to replenish the nutrients needed as well as to maintain a variety of diet. So far so good.

At five months plus of age, my son suddenly had his first fever. His temperature was as high as 38.6 degree Celsius. I was in a dillema. I did not want my son’s first food to be medicine, although I kept the Paracetamol supply given by the clinic with me. I decided to try conventional method first, which is to wipe my son down frequently and to put him on thin clothing to promote heat loss. Thank goodness he was quite cooperative, as he accepted me wiping him down and leaving a wet towel on his body without much complaints. He was still feeding as usual and wanting to play despite becoming tired after only a few minutes, so my worries became less. I checked his temperature hourly and wiped him down about every half and hour, even at night during bedtime. We huddled together a lot, as I noticed my son to be more clingy and whiny during the time. Alhamdulillah, after 24 hours, his temperature remained below 37 degree Celsius.

Finally, this month (December) we both have passed the 6 month exclusive period. We are now working towards weaning my son with solids and to continue until he is two years old as mentioned in the Quran. Alhamdulillah for the opportunity! I’m thankful that we are blessed with enough milk and patience. The most important thing is, LILLAHITA’ALA. In sha Allah, help would arrive.

All the best to other moms out there!

Exclusive Breastfeeding Journey Part 1

I contemplated writing for quite some time, phrasing and organising words in my mind whenever the ideas come. Today, I have decided to write, hopefully to share my journey, probably to answer some questions, and hopefully to inspire other mommies / mommies-to-be out there who might read this.

My son was born in the early morning, which made the beginning of my journey quite smooth. I’m saying that because despite staying up (mostly) all night for labour - I was in labour room from midnight till approximately 8 am - I was feeling energetic and, well, not as sleepy as I imagined having delivered at night would be.

The first time I fed my son was on our way back to the ward from labour room. We were both doing quite fine. Unfortunately, a few hours since then, (nearly four, to be exact) my boy kept on sleeping despite my numerous attempts at waking him for his feed. I voiced my concern to the nurse, and they even tried to wake him up unsuccessfully. After a brief discussion with the HO at the nurse counter, they decided to take his blood sample to check his glucose level. The results came back normal, thank goodness. I do understand that a newborn’s tummy is so tiny that they need frequent feeding in small amount, so, I did not give up. He had his second feeding quite successfully and I felt better. Then, we struggled for his third feeding as he prefers to sleep and sucking poorly. I was in distress, but I chose not to worry about it too much. That evening, we were allowed to be discharged from the ward, so we went home to stay at my in-laws house for a week until my husband had to go back to work again.

Delivery was the most tiring thing I had ever gone through. During the wait for my son to be delivered, at 40 weeks, I felt so tired I had wished and prayed and cried for my baby to please end his stay in my womb. My whole body was aching due to the relaxing hormone which was acting on my ligaments to ease delivery. I could barely sleep at night. The frequent toilet pit stops, the swollen ankles, aching back and pelvic and so much more. I thought after the baby is born, I’m going to get my old body self, and be as strong and fit as before. I was so wrong. *chuckles*

Anyway, during the nurse visit on his second day of life, my son was told to get his blood test done for bilirubin. Apparently he’s starting to have jaundice. The worse thing was, he refused to wake up to feed despite our many attempts. He’ll either sleep or cry loudly but still refused to drink. Alhamdulillah, I was blessed with plenty of milk that I had to pump out to prevent engorgement. To tell you the truth, the first few days after delivery, the milk letdown was so awfully painful, that during the rare time my son would suck from me, I wish to scream STOP because it was so painful. Otherwise, we had to force-feed him via bottle.

to be continued...