Exclusive Breastfeeding Journey Part 3 – Weaning Off

In June 2017, our little firstborn turned 2 years old. Alhamdulillah, we managed to still provide him with his mother’s milk until then. However, with every journey, there must be an end for it. Having gone through very painful episodes of blocked duct for more than a couple of times throughout the 2 years duration, I was naturally anxious about stopping.

Nevertheless, for various reasons, I wanted to stop my son from breastfeeding. And I prefer a method that does not involve cheating or tricking my son. That’s my preference, and I respect other moms’ methods should they feel the need to do it any other way.

A few months before stopping, I consulted with many people, mostly my own seniors or friends that have gone through the process. They shared a few tips and from there, I formed a strategy. I also read up on the topic to prepare myself mentally and physically. Coincidentally, my husband was away for the fasting month and the majority of the ‘Raya’ month. From my previous experience of fasting while breastfeeding my son, I really do not think I could go on another month of it. (Bad thinking, I know!) I felt really weak and tired last year, so I decided to ask my son to refrain from breastfeeding during the day throughout the month of Ramadan this year. Instead, I gave him the liquid, full cream milk when he wanted milk. I started to give him ‘the talk’ about a couple of weeks beforehand, to make sure that he understands and cooperates with me.

The first few days, he asked for it. We called it ‘susu ummi’ and the full cream milk as ‘susu kotak’. The first dew days of putting him to his daytime nap was quite a challenge because he is used to breastfeeding till he falls asleep. Thankfully after a couple of weeks, he got used to the arrangements. This went on until the first couple of weeks of ‘raya’, when my husband returned home.

A couple of days after my husband returned, our son seemed to be in such a good mood that we started to completely stop him from breastfeeding. We told him that he’s a big boy now, already two years old, and he could stop ‘susu ummi’ and continue eating normal food. If he misses his milk, he can drink ‘susu kotak’. We struggled for the first week, whereby he would wake up in the middle of the night, throwing tantrums and all, because he was hungry. So we tried feeding him a night snack right before putting him to sleep, to prevent hunger pang in the middle of the night. So far, it’s been nearly a month and he seemed to have been weaned off completely and successfully.

I feared that I might suffer from blocked duct or anything once I stop. Fortunately, I survived without any need to express my milk and the supply dwindled to the point that even my breasts returned to their size before I got pregnant.

I’m blessed that my husband is around to help and that my son is cooperative. Alhamdulillah, we managed to complete that part of our duty to our son. May our next chid will be blessed in the same way. Aameen.

All the best to other moms out there! I hope this sharing helps.

Our First Toilet Training Part 3 – Using the Potty

In my previous sharing, we managed to train our son to be off his diaper at 19 months of age. I will be honest. Life after that, can be quite difficult. Especially when we have to travel and the size of the toilet seat outside is only for adults. Sometimes he would pass motion on the floor and I need to pick his poo up / use a lot of water to drain the poo into the hole.

We’ve had situations whereby my son was passing motion and someone really rude keeps on knocking on the door, impatiently, until I told her “My son is using the toilet”. Then only she stopped. Well, there are many other toilet cubicles and she just had to attack mine, despite only being in there for a couple of minutes (when she started knocking).

Another situation is when there are many other cubicles available, but one selfish lady walked into the family sized one – the one with a toilet bowl for kids) and took her own sweet time inside. So please, refrain yourself from using those toilets labelled “family” unless you are taking your little children along with you.

Anyway, initially my son refused to use the potty seat (see picture) that I bought for him. I read that children needs their feet to touch the ground when passing motion, so I bought him a cheap, small potty with very basic feature.

Still, he refused to sit on it. He only passes urine/motion while standing over it, so I could just dump the whole thing inside the usual toilet bowl to be flushed. The challenge is that his poo would be stuck on his thigh and buttock, and it was such a hassle to clean. I wanted to teach him to clean himself so that I could teach him that his private parts are only for him to touch. No one else can touch him there, not even me. So with so much poo to be cleaned, I can’t make him do it himself without risking him touching everywhere with his ‘poopy’ hands. LOL.

So, to solve this, in July this year, I purchased a comfortable and cute seating potty bowl for him. (see picture). It was on sale at GIANT for RM34.99. I just had to grab it because the cheapest I have seen in LAZADA or elsewhere, is more than rm50! So now we are in the process of teaching him to use the potty, clean himself, and clean the potty bowl as well. So far so good.

I hope I can totally teach him to be independent so that I could start to teach him about no-one-should-touch-his-private-parts-but-himself soon.

Any tips from other mommies are greatly appreciated :)

All the best to other mommies out there!

Our First Toilet Training Experience Part 2

Salam.

Last week I have shared about the general rule I followed for toilet training our first son. Here is the next part of that. :)

Monday, 16th of January 2017. First day of toilet training. The most tiring! We rolled and kept away all the carpet in the house. We told him he won't be wearing any diaper from now on, and that he must pee/poop in the toilet. We asked him to repeat that many times.

We had nearly 10 accidents. He nearly ran out of pants to wear because we had to keep changing him. Not to mention the amount of work to mop the mess on top of doing the usual housechores.

Sometimes, he peed during the toilet trip. Sometimes he did not. When he did, we would congratulate, praise and encourage him. When he did not, we simply say "ok perhaps next trip you will pee". Patience is the key.

The moment my husband got back from work, I passed the baton to him to take our son to toilet. It was really tiring! But we persevered.

Night time, we slept on a comforter (because thick mattress is more difficult to clean, so bye bye comfortable bed) and layered it with a thin plastic below another layer of thinner comforter (which can be thrown into the washing machine, just in case). The tips says not to wake him up more than 2 times at night to pee, so when he wakes up for milk (12-1am and 3-4am) I would take him to toilet and ask him to pee.

Tuesday, 17th of January 2017. Same routine except the time gap between toilet trip is longer. I felt as tired as the first day (probably more). Sometimes, our son asked for his diaper. "Lampin" as he would say it. But we were firm in telling him, he won't be wearing any "lampin" anymore after this.

Just like the first day, once my husband got back from work, I passed the baton to him. Thank goodness he was ok with it.

Wednesday, 18th January 2017. Third day. We saw less accident, but I tend to ignore my guts saying that "it's time for his toilet trip" so there were some frustrating accidents. However, each toilet trip is fruitful. He was then able to pass urine when taken to toilet.

He passed motion 3 times this day. Once in toilet (I was running like crazy and taking him to toilet when I saw his grunting face, which indicate defecating is in proses a.k.a muka meneran), another two at the living room. It was easy to not be angry at him because he seemed so scared and clueless. It was apparent that he needed us to guide him so we could not get angry.

Day 4 basically had no accident. We were back to sleeping in our bed. Yay!

Friday, 20th January 2017. Day 5. A new challenge because we were taking a trip back to our parents' for the weekend. We stopped a couple of times along the highway for toilet visits and once he fell asleep, it was such a relief because we know he will not pee in his sleep.

Saturday, 21st January 2017 Day 6. He had one accident while at my husband's father's house. Probably triggered by the change in environment as well as him being busy playing with his cousins that he forgot about peeing in the toilet. Otherwise all was well.

To be continued...

Our First Toilet Training Experience Part 1

Assalamualaikum wbt / Hi

We are extremely blessed that our first son is quite a quick speaker. He started speaking comprehendable words before he was even 18 months old. He picks up words as we speak them and repeatedly try to pronouce them until he is able to remember. On top of that, he is able to use the words correctly within context afterwards.

Since we stayed at my parents' place until he was about 19 months, I had to delay his toilet training, despite seeing some signs that he is ready. However, I took the chance to introduce him to be aware of the act of passung urine and passing motion and what they are called. For example, during showertime, when I see him pee I will repeatedly tell him "this is peeing". After a while, he is then able to say it himself (the words pee & poop, "kencing" & "berak")

Once we are back in our own house, we picked a day to start, and never looked back. I am also blessed that my husband is so cooperative about this. We did our readings and strategised. We also spoke to him repeatedly about our intention a couple of days before we started.

DAY 1 Every 15 mins. Stay toilet 5 minutes. 1 hour = 3x 12 hours = 36x

DAY 2 Every 30 mins. Stay toilet 5 minutes 6 hours = 11x 12 hours = 22x

DAY 3 Every 1 hour. Stay toilet 5 minute 12 hours = 12x

No leaving the house for chores/errands at all for that 3 days.

Stop the diaper cold-turkey. NO DIAPER AT ALL EVEN AT NIGHT. (We found these tips on fb by the way)

To be continued...

Exclusive Breastfeeding Journey Part 2

I can’t remember how many time I have cried in pain and frustration at seeing my son getting more yellow by the minute, with his dark green stool (normal adequately breastfed babies should have mustard-coloured stool) and refusal to drink. I felt like a failure, as though as a mother, I was unable to help my son through one of his most crucial stage of his life. Needless to say, comments from others did not help, too.

“...the baby is crying every night as though he doesn’t get enough milk...”

“...why don’t you give him formula milk...”

“...the baby sleeps too much, why don’t you wake him up...”

and so on. Thank goodness my husband had been there a lot. The one week of leave that he was with me was so precious, because otherwise, I felt so alone and down. He’ll prepare my daily bath water and snacks with hot drinks whenever I need it. I can remember panicking when he had to leave to settle our son’s birth certificate and other paperwork, and the rush of absolute relief when he returned. And the help I get from my in-laws with the baby and my meals was priceless.

As crazy as it was during that time, the thing that kept me going was knowing that the moment will pass. I am a mother now, I told myself. I must be strong for my son! No matter how painful breastfeeding and the stitched wounds down there before they heal were, or how tired I was, or how unstable my emotions were, I must keep going for my son! This tiny, breathing human being needs me. I must be strong!

Although I managed to pump out a lot of milk at that time, I did not freeze any due to storage reason. We did not have extra fridge space. So I would recommend to parents-to-be who intend to continue breastfeeding their children even after going back to work to save up for a freezer to store the milk supply. I didn’t, mainly because my husband and I have decided that for the time being I would not have to go back to work. So I only kept some milk as much as our refrigerator can accommodate.

Day after day, our struggle during feeding time became less and less. At one month post delivery, I had my routine post natal check up and was given a clean bill of health by the doctor. The trick was, I kept taking the pregnancy vitamins (iron, folic acid, vitamin b-complex) as well as the milk that I drink during pregnancy (Frisomum) to replace the loss during delivery and breastfeeding (blood loss, nutrients, etc.) A few weeks down the road and my son no longer needs to be checked for his jaundice. His weight is gaining accordingly. He is healthy.

During the first few months, I had some issues with cracked nipple due to poor sucking technique by my son. After all, both of us were still learning. The only required remedy for me was to apply my own milk around the sore area and leave it to air-dry. A couple of hours later it will feel much better. It was the method I learnt in nursing school, so I’m sharing it with all of you.

After that, I realised that both of us were becoming better at feeding. Initially, my son, who is quite easily excited would be looking for the nipple frantically - a lot like a hungry bird pecking to get food. If he didn’t find it in a couple of seconds, he would cry and cry angrily. Naturally, the baby is unable to see yet, so he was easily anxious. I had to move as quick as I can to offer him the nipple. After a few months, though, he can find it himself, and to my profound surprise, the initial pain during let-down reflex was then replaced by a kind of relaxing and pleasant sensation that I do not know how to describe. It feels so good that I frequently fall asleep while my son is feeding! :)

Honestly, I did not take any so-called milk booster product, as I am quite a skeptic when it comes to those products. I only made sure I drink enough plain water and also take milk myself to replenish the nutrients needed as well as to maintain a variety of diet. So far so good.

At five months plus of age, my son suddenly had his first fever. His temperature was as high as 38.6 degree Celsius. I was in a dillema. I did not want my son’s first food to be medicine, although I kept the Paracetamol supply given by the clinic with me. I decided to try conventional method first, which is to wipe my son down frequently and to put him on thin clothing to promote heat loss. Thank goodness he was quite cooperative, as he accepted me wiping him down and leaving a wet towel on his body without much complaints. He was still feeding as usual and wanting to play despite becoming tired after only a few minutes, so my worries became less. I checked his temperature hourly and wiped him down about every half and hour, even at night during bedtime. We huddled together a lot, as I noticed my son to be more clingy and whiny during the time. Alhamdulillah, after 24 hours, his temperature remained below 37 degree Celsius.

Finally, this month (December) we both have passed the 6 month exclusive period. We are now working towards weaning my son with solids and to continue until he is two years old as mentioned in the Quran. Alhamdulillah for the opportunity! I’m thankful that we are blessed with enough milk and patience. The most important thing is, LILLAHITA’ALA. In sha Allah, help would arrive.

All the best to other moms out there!

Exclusive Breastfeeding Journey Part 1

I contemplated writing for quite some time, phrasing and organising words in my mind whenever the ideas come. Today, I have decided to write, hopefully to share my journey, probably to answer some questions, and hopefully to inspire other mommies / mommies-to-be out there who might read this.

My son was born in the early morning, which made the beginning of my journey quite smooth. I’m saying that because despite staying up (mostly) all night for labour - I was in labour room from midnight till approximately 8 am - I was feeling energetic and, well, not as sleepy as I imagined having delivered at night would be.

The first time I fed my son was on our way back to the ward from labour room. We were both doing quite fine. Unfortunately, a few hours since then, (nearly four, to be exact) my boy kept on sleeping despite my numerous attempts at waking him for his feed. I voiced my concern to the nurse, and they even tried to wake him up unsuccessfully. After a brief discussion with the HO at the nurse counter, they decided to take his blood sample to check his glucose level. The results came back normal, thank goodness. I do understand that a newborn’s tummy is so tiny that they need frequent feeding in small amount, so, I did not give up. He had his second feeding quite successfully and I felt better. Then, we struggled for his third feeding as he prefers to sleep and sucking poorly. I was in distress, but I chose not to worry about it too much. That evening, we were allowed to be discharged from the ward, so we went home to stay at my in-laws house for a week until my husband had to go back to work again.

Delivery was the most tiring thing I had ever gone through. During the wait for my son to be delivered, at 40 weeks, I felt so tired I had wished and prayed and cried for my baby to please end his stay in my womb. My whole body was aching due to the relaxing hormone which was acting on my ligaments to ease delivery. I could barely sleep at night. The frequent toilet pit stops, the swollen ankles, aching back and pelvic and so much more. I thought after the baby is born, I’m going to get my old body self, and be as strong and fit as before. I was so wrong. *chuckles*

Anyway, during the nurse visit on his second day of life, my son was told to get his blood test done for bilirubin. Apparently he’s starting to have jaundice. The worse thing was, he refused to wake up to feed despite our many attempts. He’ll either sleep or cry loudly but still refused to drink. Alhamdulillah, I was blessed with plenty of milk that I had to pump out to prevent engorgement. To tell you the truth, the first few days after delivery, the milk letdown was so awfully painful, that during the rare time my son would suck from me, I wish to scream STOP because it was so painful. Otherwise, we had to force-feed him via bottle.

to be continued...

A More Fullfilling Life is Ours to Have, if.......

..we choose to do something about it.. 

Salam. 

These tips were found on my friend's blog. So I thought I'd like to share this with all of you :)

Personality:
1. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
2. Don't have negative thoughts of things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment
3. Don't over do; keep your limits
4. Don't take yourself so seriously; no one else does
5. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip
6. Dream more while you are awake
7. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need..
8. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner of his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
9. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.
10. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present
11. No one is in charge of your happiness except you
12. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn.
Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
13. Smile and laugh more
14. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Community:
15. Call your family often
16. Each day give something good to others
17. Forgive everyone for everything
18. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6
19. Try to make at least three people smile each day
20. What other people think of you is none of your business
21. Your job will not take care of you when you are sick. Your family and friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:
22. Put GOD first in anything and everything that you think, say and do.
23. GOD heals everything
24. Do the right things
25. However good or bad a situation is, it will change
26. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up
27. The best is yet to come
28. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful
29. When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it
30. If you know GOD you will always be happy. So, be happy.

I will definitely try and do these. Hopefully these tips will change your life for the better too :)

All About Perfume

Salam.

Do you like to wear perfume? Unsure which type is for you? Well, here are some information about perfumes for you to enjoy. Hope it helps! :)


First of all, you will need to know which perfume is which, right? So:-

From highest concentration to least, the different forms of perfume are:

Perfume, also called Extract or Extrait (also see Glossary), can include 15-40% perfume concentrates. This is the purest form of scented product and is the most expensive as a result. Perfume (or “parfum”) lasts longer than other scent types; typically around six hours.

Eau de Parfum(EDP) contains about 7-15% perfume concentrates. This is the most popular and common form of perfume. It provides a long-lasting fragrance and generally doesn't cost as much as extract perfume.

Eau de Toilette(EDT) has around 1-6% perfume concentrates. This makes for a light scent that doesn't linger as long as the more intense versions. It was originally intended to be a refreshing body splash to help people wake up in the morning.

Eau de Cologne (EDC) is sometimes used interchangeably with the term eau de toilette. However, the concoction began as the name of a light; fresh fragrance mixed with citrus oils and was made popular by Napoleon. Some perfumers today have a version of this called Eau Fraiche.

While these are the main classes of perfume, other products are frequently scented with perfume concentrates too. Lotions, creams, powders, body splashes, aftershaves, soaps, and other cosmetic products may contain variable (though usually small) amounts of fragrance. So, now you should know exactly which “Eau de” you should be using every time. Next, there are so many fragrant to choose from!!! Help!!  No worries, here is the information for you :)

Floral – most perfumes are created by flowers and this is a highly popular scent Flowers used to create floral smell range from roses, gardenia, carnations, jasmine and orange blossoms. Sometimes these are blended together to create a floral bouquet.  Recommended floral type would be Curios by Britney spears.

Oriental- this is a good scent for the winter due to its strong musky nature it is a mixture of spices, amber, balsams and resins

Citrus- these are soft subtle fragrances that are best when used in the summer time.  The scents derive from citrus fruits, like lemon, limes, tangerine and mandarins 

Chypre- This popular scent was name by the first person to invent perfume Francois Coty, he was inspired by the island of Cyprus where he inhaled scents and thus created Chypre.  This is a woodsy-mossy mix that also has hints of bergamont, oak, moss, citrus and other earthy aromas

Green- when you think green, think of grassy, pine, leaves or anything you may find in a forest. This is a great scent for the athletic type.

Fougere- is a strong scent mostly used by men, but women also love this smell. It is a combination of fresh herbs and mossy substances.

Even though there are six major types of scents that make up perfume, there are other types of scents that are just as pleasant such as 

Oceanic- which are synthetic perfumes that emulate scents of the ocean and it’ surroundings

Fruity- sets off a spicy and fresh scent as well as a fruity smell. This is a great scent for the summer time.

Woody Scents- think forest when you think of woody scents; these scents derive from bark, moss and other things you would find in a forest.

Well, Okay, but HOW do I CHOOSE one?

Find a fragrance that complements your skin and natural aroma of your body. The scent should be subtle enough to not invade anyone else's "personal space" but pleasant enough that others will want to stay around you. Perfume is meant to enhance your personality, attire, and overall being. 

When you visit the fragrance department in a department store, sample perfumes by spraying a couple of fragrances on your skin in areas located far apart from one another. For example, spray one type on your hand and the other on your upper arm. Don't try spraying on more than two fragrances in a single trip. Then, leave the store or at least the perfume section for a few minutes to smell the fragrances on your skin. This will allow you to smell the scents without them blending with others from the fragrance section. 

Try each scent directly on your skin to be sure it's the perfect match. The fragrance should blend well with your normal body aroma, as well as the scents of your clothing detergent, shampoos, and makeup. 

If you think you've found the perfect perfume for you, wait a day before buying. Try on a sample of only that particular perfume from the department store and then leave it on for a day. Be sure it doesn't lose its scent during the day, change scents, or cause any allergies or headaches. Wearing it for a day should reveal all of these. 






Last but not least, a little do's and don't of perfume :)

Do's of Wearing Perfume

If you have dry skin, wear extra perfume. The oils in your skin, or lack thereof, can enhance or weaken the scent. 


When it's cold out, wear extra perfume. Cold weather tends to weaken the scent as well. 


When, buying new perfume, don't base your decision on what works for someone else. Try it out on your own skin first. Everyone's skin reacts differently to a scent.

The best time to apply perfume is right after a shower or bath. After bathing, your skin pores will be open and will soak up the perfume's fragrance. Also when bathing, use non-deodorized soap where the perfume will be applied. Soaps and deodorants can affect how the perfume will smell on your skin; the mixture won't always be pleasant!

When applying perfume, dab it in unusual places where it will stay warm and keep its scent longer. It can be applied on the inside of the elbow, on the wrist, neck, stomach, cleavage, and back of the knees.

Don'ts of Wearing Perfume   

Certain types of jewelry, such as costume or pearl jewelry, can become discolored due to perfume alcohols. Some jewelry can also be stripped of its outer coating. When wearing perfume with this type of jewelry, apply it away from the jewelry.

Don't use only one perfume year round. Test out various perfumes during seasonal changes to see which ones work best in the hot or cool temperatures. Different fragrances are affected by temperatures when it comes to scent intensity.

Never apply perfume behind the ears. It can blend with skin secretions and create a bad smell. Also, don't spray perfume onto light-colored clothes because it can turn the fabric yellow. 



Good luck in finding your perfume! :)

      

*information obtained from various websites.

How Long Can You Keep Your Make Up Items?

Salam.

Are you one of those people [like me] who would buy make-up items only to keep them away and use them during 'special occasion'? Well, do beware because although they look harmless, these make-up items also have their own shelf life. If you use it after the shelf life ends, you might risk using contaminated products on your skin!!! Come check this out :)

concealer

up to 12 months

powder

two years

cream & gel cleanser

1 year

pencil eye liner

up to 3 years

eye shadow

up to 3 years. if you can't afford to buy both eye liner and eye shadow, you can use the darker eye shadow as eye liners. u need to use a super flat brush for this purpose.

brushes

wash in mild detergent for every 2-3 months

sponges

wash weekly and discard monthly

foundation

water-based will last for 12 months

oil-based about 18 months.

If your water-based foundation dries out before it's expiration date, simply add a few drops of alcohol-free toner and shake to mix it in. No need to do this to oil-based foundations. Because they contain oil, they will tend to separate. You have to shake anyway.

lip liner

up to 3 years.

lipstick

some expert says 1-2 years, others say up to 4 years. If it smells rancid, it's spoilt.

lipstick stored in refrigerator last longer.

*be careful not to mix with wet items such as chicken!!*

mascara

the shortest lifespan; about 4 months.

to add lifespan, prevent from pumping the wand in and out because it will then be exposed to drying air.

nail polish

up to 12 months, depending on quality.

Well, make sure your money spent on these items are worth it, yeah, friends :)

** taken from: What Is the Shelf Life of Makeup?

How long can you keep lipstick, eyeshadow and foundation?

By Julyne Derrick, About.com Guide **