Part 8

Her hand was as gentle as ever, slowly caressing his hair back and forth as he rested his head in her lap, closing his eyes tightly. It was his favourite gesture, and he could not believe that this might be the last time he’d be able to feel that. He could not even look at her, he was afraid that he would break.

“Thank you so much, for staying with me for the past two years.” He started to say, his voice quivering as he was nearly choked with his tears. “You know that I love you, don’t you?” he asked, reaching for her hand and clutched it tight. He felt her nodded above him.

Then he felt it, the wetness that was slowly flowing through him, as though it was seeping through from deep inside his soul. She made a promise to him a couple of years ago, that she’d stay with him, till he was able to let her go. He thought that, when they made that pact, he was able to recover after some time, or at least got better. But he was wrong. How could he ever get over her? She was his love, she was his life. And she was brutally taken away from him. He was just not prepared for the abruptness of her leaving him. Why must it happen so soon? When they’d just got together? When they were just beginning to build their life together and fulfil the promises they’d made to each other years ago?

Till death do us apart. Oh, how those words rang true! And oh, how it hurt!

“I am sorry that we could not spend more time together, my love. Did I make you happy? Was I a good husband? You know you were the best wife any man could ever ask for. I was blessed to have been with you.” It was painful saying that, because he knew, even before they were married, he never had time for her. He was always busy, rushing through to settle this and that, always believing that he’ll have his whole life in the future to spend time with her.

Even after their marriage, he always had to leave, for work, for outings with friends, for reunions, for social events that she could not attend. She never complained, other than the occasional silence when he asked her how her day was. In fact, that was very seldom too, him asking her how her day had been. He always thought he would have time, later, when in fact, after the accident that had taken her away from him; he’d lost his chance at all.

To the world, he was a crazy husband who was still hooked on his dead wife. Only he knows that, Libby had returned, even though he was the only one who could see her, to allow him to make up for his stupidity.

“God, I missed you, Libby. I missed you so much! I’m so sorry honey, for all those tears you cried silently, for all those time I left you all alone.” He recalled her birthday celebration whereby he had foolishly volunteered to be elsewhere at the last minute to attend a course and had completely forgotten about her plans for the night. They’d promised to go out together, for once in a fancy restaurant that she’d always wanted to go, but hadn’t been able to due to their clashed schedule.

He remembered how her face fell when he had to cancel their first wedding anniversary celebration because he had ‘made plans’ with Remy to attend a reunion with their pals from other countries and had, forgotten to promise to be back early.

“I’m sorry, for not being with you when you died.....” and this time, he could not hold his tears as he remembered having to go for another elective course in a different state, and when the call from his mother to inform him that Libby’s condition was getting worse was missed. He didn’t even call his mother back to enquire about the missed call. And when he got back on the weekend, he was devastated beyond belief. But he could not turn back the time.

After the talk with Doctor John, it was like a wakeup call for him. He rushed back home and searched through his files where he found his wife’s death certificate. It all came crashing down on him then, and he called everyone who knew her, like a madman, trying to confirm the news. Apparently, they’d let him live in his imagination long enough, thinking that he’d be fine after a while.

Gosh, how stupid he must’ve looked to them!

And yet, as he felt Libby’s hand stroking his hair rhythmically, he felt at ease. He finally found the courage to open his eyes and looked up into her face. She was crying, too despite looking so serene. He mouthed ‘I love you’ to her and she smiled.

Tenderly, she kissed his forehead, and whispered, “I forgive you... Now it’s time for you to live...”

BAM!

The sound of the door slammed by the strong wind woke him up with a start. He looked around him, trying to remember where he was. His heart was beating as though in a frenzy.

Then he realised something. Libby was dead. He took their framed photograph at the bedside table and stared and stared.

Finally, he took a deep breath kissed the picture, as though saying goodbye for the last time, and put the picture back where it belonged.

-The end-

Part 7

He slammed the door to his office. Lydia and he had a talk that pissed him off last night over a drink while he was waiting for Libby to be back from her work. He just refused to believe it. It was too absurd.

His mom had called, too, inviting him over for the weekend, and when he said he’d talk to Libby, his mom had told him the exact same thing that Lydia had told him. Noooooo! He will never believe them! Not in a million years!

And yet...

“Accept it my friend, your wife is dead! People call you crazy. I can no longer let them do so. This has gone on for too long!” Remy’s voice hit his heart like a bullet would. His nostrils flared to keep up with his laborious breathing. They’d struggled in his office, because he’d punched Remy’s face the first time he said those damned words. His wife is NOT dead!

“Do you remember the accident that happened nearly two years ago? Well, she survived the crash, but she was gone in the hospital. She’d left us all,” Remy continued, gently wiping away the trickle of blood at the corner of his lips.

When Remy wanted to start again, he hushed his best friend. He stared at Remy long and hard from where he was standing. Finally, he picked up his coat said “You’re lying,” to Remy and left the office.

He drove around aimlessly for nearly an hour before he stopped in front of the hospital where she worked. He found an empty parking spot right beneath a tree and went inside, to the ward where he knows he’ll find his wife. She’s in her morning shift today, so he was expecting to be able to see her. He’ll prove to Remy that his wife is alive and well. Remy is so wrong about her being dead. How could she be, when she cooks him dinner every night and fall into bed with him and wake up right next to him the nest day? How could she be dead when her sweet smell is all over their home?

Just as he was entering the ward, he bumped into the specialist who had treated Libby after her accident a couple of years ago.

“Oh, hey, Dr. John. Do you remember me, Libby’s husband?” he asked, after apologising.

A flicker of doubt, then a smile of recognition after several heartbeats appeared on the kind doctor’s face. “Of course I remember you. How do you do?”

Suddenly, a thought occurred to him. He needed to clear this up once and for all. So, he took a deep breath, and, while crossing his fingers, said “Doctor, could we please talk? About Libby?”

The doctor looked curious, but he nodded and showed him to his office. “This way, please,”

to be continued...

Part 6

The house seemed dark when he reached home that night. He was late due to a lengthy meeting and a massive traffic jam on his way back. He missed his wife. It was nearly 2100h and he was in need of a serious time in the shower.

A sudden blinding flas of light greeted him when he turned the lock and opened the door.

"S u r p r i s e!!" everybody yelled. A cake with 25 candles was shoved in front of him as the crowd sang 'Happy birthday' right till the end. He blinked, dumbfounded, loss for words.

A moment of silent and then, "Blow the candles already!" that was his youngest sister, loud, as usual. He regained his composure, blew the candles and everybody was cheering. Fod goodness' sake, he's too old for this, he thought. He scanned the crowd and saw that all of his family members were there, and quite a number of people from work, his closest friends and some neighbours that he knew were there too.

In a matter of seconds, somebody cut the cake and offered a slice around. On his dining table there were armloads of food, more that he knew they could possibly finish, and music was playing gently in the background. His house did not look like his own. When did this happen? The planning, the preparation.. Whoa.

He went to Lydia, his sister in law, and whispered "Where is she?" her smile died at that.

Lydia looked uncomfortable. "We've talked about this," she warned, and he took a deep breath. After a lengthy silence, he nodded, raised his head and saw her. She was walking towards him with the biggest grin ever. He threw one last glance at Lydia and grinned back at is wife.

"Happy birthday, sweetheart. I love you," she whispered in his ear and kissed his cheek gently. He felt her press something into his palm, so he grasp at it and kept it in his pants pocket.

"Thank you, my love. Is this your plan?" he queried, taking her hand and poured a drink for her. She took the glass gracefully, while shaking her head.

After taking a sip of the purplish drink, his favourite colour, she responded simply. "Your mom," Her head was inclined towards a general direction, so he turned to look. True enough, his mom was making her way to him. Libby excused herself, the moment his mother reached him.

"Thanks ma," he said, accepting a kiss form his mother. "Libby said it's your idea,"

A melancholic smile appeared on her suddenly tired-looking face. "Happy birthday, my dear," she said gently. He noticed the tears that was forming in her eyes, and almost panicked. He's not a fan of tears, women tears, and most especially his own mother's.

"Just remember that we all love you, son," his mother said simply, lookind deep into his eyes. He smiled.

"I love you too, ma,"

to be continued...

Part 5

The sound of someone knocking on his door jerked him out of his reverie. His pal, Remy stuck his head in, a slow smile playing on his mischiveous face. "Yo, buddy, want to go for lunch?"

He glanced at the clock on his wall. True enough, it's lunch time. He wondered what she was doing right now, probably busy writing her nursing reports for pass over at 1400h. "Sure, your treat, right?" he responded as cheekily. Throwing one last lingering look at their smiling faces on his desk, he got up and left.

The accident occured almost a year ago, and he thanked God that she was fine now. The last of her casts was opened a couple of months ago. There were the scars that remind them of everything that had happened, of which always made her feel so conscious around him in the beginning. After weeks of convincing on his part, she was much better, more confident and no longer jerk away when he touched her.

"How's Libby?" Remy was asking once they had takent heir seats. He was silent for a while. "She's amazing," he said slowly, missing the pitying look his friend gave him as he was too occupied with his menu.

"Good to hear that," Remy responded. And they talked about other things after that, about the army, current issues, football and everything else. Nothing about his wife was ever mentioned again.

That evening, he got home later than usual, and he'd already told Libby about it. However, when he got home, the house was empty. The food was spread on the dining table, still piping hot and covered. He looked everywhere for her, and even tried her cellphone. But he couldn't get her. Finally he went into their room, and saw the note stuck to the vanity, with her cellphone on top of it. She's forever leaving her handphone everywhere since the accident.

Out with friends, I'll be back ASAP. Love you. -eLLe-

He let out a sigh of relief. After taking a shower, he waited for her, but it was later than he expected that he eventually had his dinner/supper and went to wait for her in his study. Surely she'll be back before sunrise. She's having her day off tomorrow, but surely she'll come back?

Hours after hours later, she still hadn't return. He finally decided to turn in for the night. Just as he was standing up, stretching some muscles, he heard her return. The lava of panic that had threatened to overflow all night finally receded when she stunbled in, a huge grin plastered on her face upon seeing him.

"Hey, handsome, you're still up?" she went to him to kiss him. "I missed you," she breathed, and he whispered the exact words right back. Now I can finally sleep, he thought, as he climbed into their bed and she left to take her shower.

to be continued...

Part 4

The call was inevitable. He saw it in the breaking news, and he didn't know whether he was lucky or unlucky for that. The moment the news was out, his cellphone didn't stop ringing that he had to switch it off. He felt so numb. He tried her cellphone, to no avail. And within a few hours, uniformed men were on his office doors, asking to take him to the hospital.

"Sweetheart, what Guiness World record are you trying to break?" he asked lightly the moment he entered her ward, seeing how badly broken she was. Multiple fractures in her arms and legs, lacerated wounds on her face and he believed that almost 99% of her body was bandaged.

She attempted to smile at him. "I'm ok. I just thought I needed the rest," her voice was broken, just like how he was feeling inside. He reached for her fingers, the only part that was not covered in bandage and kissed each of them.

"I'm sorry," she whispered softly and he could not contain his tears. "For what?" he asked, swallowing lumps in his throat.

"For not being able to cook for you anymore," she responded.

"You can do that when you've recovered, please, just focus on getting well, OK?" he squeezed her fingers lightly. "I love you,"

She smiled a little, though the forlorn look was still in her eyes, and her voice was barely audible when she said next "I love you. I wish it too..."

He sensed a but somewhere along her sentence, but she let it drift and he wouldn't ask her. He just couldn't. They were silent for a long time, staring at each other, lost in their own thoughts. He'll talk to the doctors soon, to find out everything that he can. He's not ready to let her go. Perhaps he never will. God, please, make her OK. Make all this a dream. Please, God.

About half an hour later, she was fast asleep, and a nurse was asking him to see the doctor. He took a deep breath. This is it. With his heart weighing heavy in his chest, he followed the petite nurse to the doctor's office.

"Sweetheart, I'll be back," he kissed her forehead and left. The moment he left, a single tear fell down her cheek, slowly absorbed into the bandage on her head. She wept in her sleep and perhaps that was the only time she was able to do that.

to be continued...

Part 3

They'd agreed on purple. She wanted green, he knew she loved green, but her love for him made her agreed to his choice of colour. So, purple her dress was, and he was clad in his army uniform, so nervous, he thought his heart would burst out of his chest any moment.

Walking under the swords barrel, him promising his undying love and commitment as he put on his ring on her, and the kiss they'd shared that day, those things made it the most magical day of his life, with friends and families celebrating their happiness together. She got her wish, a wedding in their secondary school hall, decorated with purple daisies that she loved so much. They were so young, yet they were sure of what they'd wanted. The moment he looked into her eyes, on their wedding night, he knew that he's going to love her forever. Nothing will ever come between them, unless god willed it so.

Nearly three years later he was looking at her now, toying with her food, as she usually did when she's got things on her mind. He wanted to ask, but he already knew the answer. So, he kept his silence. He missed her chatter so much. Tonight we'll talk. he thought adamantly.

Later at work, he was staring at their wedding photo yet again, when something struck his mind. He immediately picked up his phone and dialled. Ooh, she's going to LOVE it. He just knew. He just hoped that he's not too late.

"I missed you," was the first thing she said when he entered their home. She was, as always, looking so radiant in her favourite t-shirt and shorts. "And I, you," He bent to kiss her gently and she guided him to the living room, where she'd prepared his favourite snack. Immediately his appetite was whetted and he salivated at the sight.

Excitedly he bite into the succulent doughnuts, and it didn't take him long to polish all four of them off. When he finally raised his head, satisfied, she was covering her mouth, trying to hide her laugh and snorting at every interval as she did so. She always snorted when she was genuinely amused but was trying to hide it. He couldn't help but to laugh at her snort.

"You laugh like a horse, eh," he said, pinching her cheek, playfully hard.

"And you eat like a pig" she said, finally letting out her hearthy laugh, tears began to form in her eyes. " I didn't even get ONE," she added, and laughed some more.

Oh my god. He totally forgotten about that, and he reddened. "It's ok, you're already so fat," he said, and they burst out laughing.

"You're fatter," she responded cheekily. Eventually they stopped laughing and throwing mock-insult at each other long enough for him to take a shower and start helping her made dinner.

This is life, he thought, as he was watching her chopping off some spring onion and he continued to clean the chicken parts happily. I want to stay like this forever.

to be continued...

Part 2

"Sweetheart, we made a pact. We shouldn't let this go on forever. You need to live," she said gently over dinner that night, looking at him seriously.

He looked away. As usual, she cooked his favourite food for dinner and they were scrumptously yummy. Yet his appetite was gone. He just couldn't stand to look into her deep brown eyes and just know that she meant every word. He knew that she's telling him the truth, and he didn't want that truth to happen. He never realised how fast time flies.

Gently, she touched his face, and he shut his eyes, willing the tears to go away. He couldn't, and as the warm liquid leaked out onto his cheek, she kissed him gently, wiping the tears away. "I love you, dear. Please don't cry,"

They embraced, and stayed that way for a long, long time. God, why? Why must this happen to them? Why, why oh God!

That night in their bed, he sang to her, and she was resting her head on his chest, playing her fingers on his palm. He sang their favourite song, he sang and sang, knowing how much she loved that and she kept playing at his palm till they both fell asleep, exhausted, and emotionally drained. She prayed in her heart, for his to be strong, and as she listened to his strong heartbeat, she knew that he'll be just fine. Somehow, the thought made her want to cry.

Some hours that felt like a few minutes later, he opened his eyes. Blinking rapidly. She was still curled up in his arms, fast asleep. Ah... finally. He smiled despite the pain. Gently playing with her beautifully long hair that he loved so much, he he watch her eyelid flutter and she woke, staring into his eyes.

"Good morning sunshine," he whispered, grinning like a child. She chuckled and tickled his belly. "Morning sugarplum." they kissed for a while, and eventually, reluctantly she got up, and started tidying up the bed. He took his cue and reached for their towels. He didn't want to waste another day. A new day has come, and his time is running out fast.

They showered together, then she went to prepare breakfast as he pore over some of his work papers. He wanted to help, but she'd only shush him away, saying that he's a distraction when she needed to move fast. He didn't take offence because he'd help her with dinner and they'd take forever and he's content with that. He needed to finish some work anyway.

After a while, he reached for the framed photo of them on their wedding day. She looked radiant. The day was a blast. Slowly hid mind drifted away to that magical day, when she officially became his......

to be continued..

Part 1

RINGGGGGGGGG....!!!!

His hand shot out of the blanket, groaning while feeling for the alarm clock on the bedside table. A few seconds of peace later, he turned to his side. True enough, her side of the bed was neatly made, and she was nowhere to be seen. Probably busy in the kitchen preparing their breakfast. He took a glance on the clock. It was 6a.m. sharp. I must wake up earlier than her tomorrow. He got out of bed, smiling as he thought of her.

"Smells good," he complimented honestly, staring at her lovely face with a sheepish smile while pulling a chair to sit. In a few minutes he'll be sending her off to work. She looks dashingly lovely in her work uniform. And she was smiling while laying out his plates for him.

"Come, sit with me" he invited, pulling the chair next to him. She was the most beautiful person he'd ever seen. Inside and out. He'll never stopped being awed by her, and everything about her. It's been nearly three years of their marriage, yet he never once got bored of her, or of looking at her. She takes his breath away, each time.

They began to eat in silence. Today, somehow, she seemed sad. And he knew why. But he didn't want to even think about it. God, he couldn't even imagine it. He was fighting the sudden panic attact that was threatening to burst out, yet on the outside, he maintained his composure.

"Sugar, we need to talk," she said after polishing off her breakfast. It was his favourite, fried chicken rice and tea. She always cooked his favourite food when he's around. Another precious thing about her that he just can't get over, time after time.

Wiping off his mouth, his heartbeat leaped and bounded and he was on the verge of screaming out loud at the unjustness of it all. "We'll talk tonight, shall we? We need to send you off to work first," his calmness surprised himself. She inclined her head, understandingly. He'll never get over her. Ever. God!

"Come on," he invited, offering his hands to her. He'd drop her off to work, then he'd return home to clean up the kitchen and get ready for work. That's their routine for this week, before she begins her evening shift next week. Their life was forever changing according to their hectic schedule. He's an army officer, she's a nurse. They could never have any children, due to some unexplainable reason. But his life with her was perfect enough as it is, that he would never ask for more. Being able to live with her, for one more day, was more than enough.

He kissed her forhead, as she bent to shake and kiss his hand. "I love you," they both said at the same time, and she laughed, pinching his cheek lightly. "See you handsome," she said, getting out of the car with her serene smile.

He watched her body being swallowed into the huge hospital building, taking a deep breath to ease the ache in his heart. God, I love her so much! Please give me the strength to face whatever you have in store for us. I don't know what I'd do without her!

After a while, he drove off. Another day is laid out in front of him. Another one that he'd cherish as much as he can. Another day that would mean, less days in the future for him and her. Oh, snap out of it! He killed the thought and kept on driving. She's here now. That's all that matters...

to be continued...